No Not Dead But Eternal

i feel so desperate for Brendan sometimes...
All I can think of is:
where did he go?
where did he go?
where did he go?

I don't want this dust
I want him!

No one prepared
me for this.
Grief is the absolute
worst of the worst.

No one has prepared
any of us for this.
We are eternal
We go away when
we die,
But no one gets
to remember
where we truly belong
It's this amnesia...

I can't remember where I belong
I can't remember where "home" is.

I wish it were easier to talk to the
dead.
And why do we keep saying: dead
No, not dead,
But eternal.